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What The Dell? My Laptop Just Exploded!
Tom Attea-NewsLaugh.com

 
Dell, which can’t seem to avoid ad slogans that substitute its name for hell, has recently found itself confronted with the apt inadvertence of its laptops bursting into flame. Facing such a deleterious constraint on the eagerness of consumers to buy the explosive creations, the company has agreed to recall 4.1 million of its incendiary notebooks.

The culprit, as you’ve no doubt read, is lithium-ion batteries, which can overheat more than defective casings can withstand.

Since no things Dell are really Dell, except the logo it sticks on its products, we find the cause of the explosive surprises being attributed to a manufacturing defect at Sony, which makes the batteries for Dell.

The embarrassing occasion for Dell proves a boon to Hewlett-Packard, which for ages has railed that Dell invents nothing while it invests enormously in research and product design.

Now, while Dell, along with other notebook wholesalers like Lenovo and, surprisingly, Apple, are expressing their worrisome wonderings about their own batteries, Hewlett has been able to come out smugly and say it has no concern at all about its own batteries, because they’re designed especially for HP notebooks.

While we do not learn who actually makes Hewlett’s, we do note that being involved in the technology of the items you’re selling certainly seems to have some advantages over simply hustling products without anymore reassurance than buying the innards from various suppliers who promise to be reliable.

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs."

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